my hard time letting go, but i had to

OMG!!!!!!! i was swimming on the island of coco cay and spotted this gorgeous seashell!!! it was just floating there in the water staring at me as i stared back at it. it was sooo beautiful and shiny. I screamed! it was a beautiful treasure glistening in the sun, a precious shell just unclaimed? why didnt anyone see this? it was huge!!! how could it just be there waiting for me? that's how i feel alot in life....finding a beautiful thing and wondering why it was meant for me? do i deserve it? is it true? will it last?

i'm a mermaid!!!

oh, btw there was a live fish in the shell so i couln't fly over seas back home with it and a local fisherman advised me it should stay in its home natural water. I was sad i couldn't bring it home!!! boooohoooo, seriously?! it was mine! but honestly, it wasn't. just like a lot of things in life i had to let it go.

i slowly walked into the ocean and threw it as far as i could and made a wish while it was in the air. I wished that i could let go of things in life just like that shell. But sometimes that's easier said than done huh. There are things in my past that had really hurt me and it still pains me until today. I cry or just feel numb when i reminisce about some of the things i lost or failed at. but i have grown ALOT over the past few years. in one year, my mom died, i wasn't close to my father or grandmother so i felt detached and lost, my divorce was painful, my son moved away to start his life and i missed him and needed him, my bff died and my new home flooded, i worked 2 jobs and had to rebuild all the pieces...my life spiraled downhill in a pool of loss and pain. i never had to be so strong. EVER!!! my survival tool was to let it all go and let God take over the wheel. It was the only way I made it through. I had to just push through believing that i will see better days and blessings are in my future.

the bible speaks about letting go:

Luke 9:62 "But Jesus said to him, “No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.”

bottom line...there's no looking back if i want to go forward to heaven, let go just like i let the seashell go....there are other new treasures and memories waiting for me in life! i go after my dreams and have faith! 

Trust me, anything suffering you face, it will be a blessing for you. I pray for you that you will see brighter days!!! I'm hoping my online very "open" diary will touch someone's heart and my testimony will help them. Thats my desire...

Add this to your work out program !!! lose weight asap!!! the secret is "Heart" conditioning

The secret to weight loss is in the quote below.  If you feel heavy and overweight of stress, burden, hatred, negativity, resent, then try this new workout regimen that helps lose that dead mental weight instantaneously.

wow! this is so so so true!

If we would spend as much time in the gym as we did lifting others up we would be super skinny and buffed! lol! I enjoy helping people with personal growth, giving candid advice all hours of the day. Answering emails giving feedback and offering my perspective on their daily issues or life struggles. But when my life gets soooo busy and hectic it's easy to forget my daily "heart" exercise`and help others. I need to lift people up DAILY. I need to make a conscious effort to give back even when I do not have anything for myself. Sometimes I feel so so so drained, depleted and just kinda beat down. I'm thinking you can relate right? If that's the case, how can I possibly give to others when I too am drowning? Easy!!!! Just give..simple as that...give my money, my time, my my support whatever. Not only when I can but when I can't. That's my goal - Give everyday when i just feel like i can't mentally. Sacrificial Giving is a biblical truth.  

Proverbs 3:27 says ^"Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, When it is in the power of thy hand to do it.

ok sooooo my mission was accomplished today. I Increased my tithing and gave a scooter to a kid on the street. (I had an extra one) oh and i was in a total rush but i helped a random confused lady pick out some nail polish at cosmetic up counter. Boy was she lost! but i patiently explained to her that she cannot wear that shade of purple with her pinkiy-ish dress for her bffs wedding! she seemed to appreciate my advice, I'm glad I gave her my time eventhough i soooo had to get going. it was worth it to see her smile and she felt understood.

I'm liking this "heart" workout. I need to sweat and give till it hurts... just like in the gym.

this was a homeless man i got a pic of on my trip to paris. Powerful moment to see his humility. His sign is so simple. French translation "I'm hungry" He sat there with such peace and patience. I had to give my euros, i had to. I need to practice this way more

Lord, you have blessed me so so much, I want to be more like You everyday.

Lord, who am i? What do i do? Why should they choose me? its bio time baby...

I slipped up ...big time...aw man...

yup, i totally did. i was guilty of not getting some things done that i wanted to accomplish. i'm a veeeeery regimented and consistent person. buuuut I was tired and plain flat out exhausted. Just depleted and zoned out for a few days. why? I wasn't sure so I reset my goals and turned to the Lord for clarity.

yayayyaya  i  got myself a huuuuge action chalk board which maps out my goals. I looove it. Its so clear and i can be creative instead of writing my thoughts on a boring word document in "calibri font" auuugh so boring! i cant stand that font.....meh...so blah...

click here for awesome deals on home office chalkboards

i reached my daily goal! i did it! such an amazing and rewarding feeling. The Lord is a powerful life coach

so anyways,  did u know that white boarding and brainstorming is a biblical truth used back then as a powerful tool for His people to set goals too????

Habakkuk 2:2-3 says:

And then God answered: “Write this. Write what you see. Write it out in big block letters so that it can be read on the run. This vision-message is a witness pointing to what’s coming.It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait!And it doesn’t lie.If it seems slow in coming, wait.It’s on its way. It will come right on time.

Remember! for every minute you are negative, hurt, resentful or angry you give up 60 seconds where you could have had of a peace of mind.

forget all the negativity and believe in yourself. Your dreams will come true, you will meet your ultimate goals and you will see a breakthrough...